PITTSBURGH — Cheese boards are the ultimate party platter during the holidays, including on New Year’s Eve, because who among us doesn’t like to nibble a little of this and nosh a bit of that while sipping on a flute of Champagne?
Yet for the person in charge of assembling said board, especially one who can’t tell a sharp English cheddar from an aged Spanish Manchego, they can prove quite the stressor.
So many tastes and textures! and why does this one cost so much more than that one? It’s enough to drive you mad, or at the very least shake your confidence in being the perfect party host.
Depending on your budget and time frame, companies such as Blanket & Board, Boards and Baskets and The Cheese Queen can do the heavy lifting for you with pre-made charcuterie boxes and cheese boards. Books such as America’s Test Kitchen’s “Boards: Stylish Spreads for Casual Gatherings” (2022, $30) can also provide guidance and inspiration, if you have the time to page through them.
Anais Saint-Andre Loughran, who owns Chantal’s Cheese Shop in Pittsburgh, has these words of advice: Stop worrying so much about it!
A cheese board, she says, “is a blank canvas you fill with your heart,” adding, with a reassuring laugh, “There are no hard rules about it.”
In France, where Loughran grew up, cheese is routinely eaten after dinner, “and you cut as you go,” she says. In the U.S., it’s something of a mystery why the pre-cut cheese boards arranged in beautiful patterns are “so specific” when they really don’t have to be to work their magic.
What you should consider, however, is buying artisan cheeses whose purchases will help support a farm and/or family. Then, she says, “just have fun.”
Your local cheesemonger is always eager to recommend which cheeses pair well with which foods and wines. and specialty shops such as Loughran’s on Penn Avenue, which she opened with husband, Chris, and named after her mother, have so many lovely, quality varieties from throughout the world — France to Italy to Spain to Wisconsin — that you really can’t go wrong.
If you like all firm or semi-firm cheeses, such as gouda or cheddar, go for it. It’s equally OK to play around with different flavors and textures if you like variety.
So if Loughran had to compose the perfect, seasonal cheese board for New Year’s Eve, what three or four cheeses would be on it?
Because you’re most likely drinking bubbly, she’d start with a rich and bloomy triple cream cheese made with goat’s milk and cow’s cream, such as Nettle Meadow’s Kunik (which means “kiss” in Inuit) from upstate New York. It’s a little firmer than Brie, “but melts on the palate.”
She’d also put a cheese that’s been washed or smeared with a brine, alcohol or beer on the plate. Rusk Creek Reserve from Uplands Cheese Co. in Wisconsin, which is aged in a special spruce bark, immediately comes to mind. The smell can be pungent, but the custardy cheese inside is sweet and sour dough-y.
Third on the board is something semi-firm and “drunken” — Ubriaco al Prosecco, a cow’s milk hard cheese from Veneto, Italy, that is soaked in the unfiltered dry sparkling wine for 30 days. It can be crumbled like Parmesan or shaved into long slices, and what a wonderful flavor: You can almost taste the fizzles, says Loughran.
Finally, a decent board should always have a wild card that’s a blue. A creamy, crumbly Stilton from English cheesemaker Colston Bassett goes well with a dessert wine or port. “And it’s British so it’s got earthier tones,” she says.
Other suggestions: You can’t miss with a nutty Alpine cheese from France, such as a 36 Month Comte or Adarre Reserve, made with a blend of sheep and goat milks. and don’t forget about the most famous of French cheeses, a soft and spreadable goat’s milk chevre. You’ll love its tangy kick.
When it comes to how much to buy, plan on 1 ounce per cheese per person, if it’s an appetizer, or 3 ounces per cheese per person if the board is the main course. If you’ve got some meat eaters on the guest list, you can’t go wrong adding two meats for every four cheeses; popular charcuterie include salami, prosciutto and coppa.
Loughran suggests folding the meats into different shapes instead of simply laying them flat — think cigarettes, trumpets and roses. Then, fill the empty spaces with garnishes such as olives, pickles, dips, honey, jam, dried or fresh fruits, nuts and even butter. “Julienne whatever you’ve got and just put it out,” she says. “It’s free fall.”
Finally, don’t forget to finish it up with crackers, and maybe a few nice touches like flowers, cranberries or pine boughs that speak to the season.
“Having rules is the wrong way to let your heart speak,” says Loughran.