You know, there’s a surgery for that.”
“For dying alone?”
There’s an unspoken rule in journalism that opening your writing with a quote is cliche and cheesy, but I had to break it for this one.
“Materialists” really had that many good quips that I just couldn’t help it.
But let’s back up a second because the film really was a delightful surprise for me.
I’d Googled what movies were out this week and the pickings were slim. Truth be told, I’d kind of wanted to see what was up with “The Life of Chuck” but that wasn’t playing nearby.
The other movies on tap? Three sequels, two remakes, a horror flick and a Ryan Reynolds’ kids movie.
I was scrolling back and forth through those when the last movie on the list caught my eye: “Materialists.”
Not gonna lie, the poster kinda sold me. It’s very old fashioned, just a glamour shot of the three leads and an elegant typeface on the title.
But beyond that, I knew absolutely nothing about the film.
And that’s awesome. Do that more often.
No spoilers here, but if you want to go in totally blind, I say go for it.
The film follows Lucy (Dakota Johnson), a professional matchmaker in New York City, fresh off the news that one of her couples is getting married, the ninth marriage that Lucy has managed to arrange.
At the wedding, the brother of the groom — Harry, played by Pedro Pascal — overhears Lucy discussing her work and the keys to successful dating and starts to talk her up.
Their banter reaches a warm pitch for both of them. But Lucy then finds that her ex, John (Chris Evans), is working as a caterer at the wedding and they have a light reunion too.
It’s a Prince and the Pauper story, then, as Lucy is forced to weigh her heart against the wealthy and charming Harry and her loyal little golden retriever of an ex.
This story plays out against the grind of Lucy’s work life as she has to listen to her clients describe their ideal matches.
Those scenes, as the film jumps from one wild client to the next, are some of the most frightening I’ve seen on film in a long time.
And I just watched “Sinners” last month, y’all.
But that’s the point. Director Celine Song’s camera doesn’t shy away from the horrors.
• The 40-something man seeking girls in their early-20s because their “fertility” evidently starts going down by 27.
• The woman who was bubbly over her date at first but then, gently turned down for a second date, starts ripping into every flaw about him.
One quick note is that, yes, the film does well to note that the risks of a “bad date” for a woman are often far more serious than for men, but it does a strikingly good job of pointing out how men have hearts that can break too.
Altogether, it makes for a squirmingly fun date night movie, or a sharply ominous one for us singles, filled with gasps, laughs and head shakes a’plenty.
Now, of course, you could say that dating has always been a nightmare like that.
But it feels like a very 2025 question to ask that — with the world constantly in our faces and so many monsters in the comment sections — who would ever want to wade into that?
Well, the film frequently contrasts characters’ fears of “dying alone” with the hope of finding “the love of your life.”
And even at her lowest point, when she has no reason to keep up the matchmaker act, Lucy assures them that they’ll be okay and they will find that love someday.
She says it in the only tone that anyone can: with no proof beyond a warm, yearning hope that it’s true.
I give “Materialists” 5 stars out of 5.