EFFINGHAM — Fathers and sons can oftentimes share those special bonds.
It could be going to sporting events or concerts together, fishing, or just sitting around and talking.
For Ryan and Terry Chapman, that special bond was officiating.
“Dad got me started,” Ryan said. “I would watch his games and, one day, he was like, ‘You ‘gotta give it a shot.’ So, we did, and I said, ‘No, that’s not going to work.’ He’s like, ‘You’ve got to give it a couple of games before you decide.’
“I stuck with it. It was a passion that we both shared. It was more than just refereeing ballgames; it was the camaraderie and the time we spent together. It was a lot of fun being able to work with Dad.”
Terry passed away on July 23 at Barnes-Jewish Hospital in St. Louis.
Ryan is continuing to officiate today. He knows that would be what Terry would have wanted.
“My thought process is, ‘How can we continue that legacy?’” Ryan said.
Terry started officiating around the time he married his wife of 43 years, Patti.
Patti said basketball was Terry’s first love.
“We got married in June and we were trying to figure out how to get some extra money. He always loved [basketball], so he thought, ‘Why not?” Patti said. “I remember he got hold of the basketball test, and he’s not a really good test-taker, so we actually took the test together.”
Terry and Ryan have officiated football and basketball over the years. Patti mentioned that Terry also dabbled in baseball, softball and volleyball.
To most who knew Terry, he was more than an official — he was a teacher.
“I thought Terri was more of a coach than a referee. You would see him whispering in kids’ ears, ‘Don’t do that. Don’t do this,” Patti said.
Ryan’s wife of 17 years, Dawn, is an Effingham graduate and played volleyball there.
She is now a licensed volleyball official and couldn’t thank anyone other than Terry for helping her.
“Terry is the one who got me started in volleyball. I played volleyball in junior high and high school at Effingham and thought it was something I could do, but if Terry hadn’t led me through that, I probably would never have done it,” Dawn said.
Terry was scheduled to officiate the St. Anthony and Effingham volleyball match on Sept. 2.
Stepping in for Terry that night was Ryan, who served as the down-judge for the varsity match. Dawn was the up-judge.
The two were greeted near the scorer’s table before the starting lineups were introduced to a message that made them emotional.
“It was very emotional; the words were heartfelt,” Dawn said.
“St. Anthony is a classy group over there,” Ryan added. “They do a great job giving honor where honor’s due. I appreciated that they said something about Dad.”
Patti knows that though a big part of her family’s life is gone, Terry’s legacy still lives with Ryan and Dawn.
He was always proud of Ryan and would have been even prouder today.
“Terri was so proud of Ryan. He was so proud to get to referee with his son,” Patti said. “He cherished every moment of referring with Ryan and all of the people he was able to help.”
Not even a trip to the state tournament to officiate could match the feeling of officiating games with his son.
Terry earned that exclusive trip in 2008.
At the time, Patti was living in Missouri and Terry was living in Fairfield. Terry knew the time had come for him to get the call, so he stayed in Fairfield.
“That was how important doing that state tournament was,” Patti said.
Ryan said that he and Terry would break down every game once it was over.
He added that there were arguments along the way.
“The arguments; that was the fun part,” Ryan said. “Iron sharpens iron. We made each other better, just by asking the hard questions. We would replay those plays in our head and say, ‘Yeah, I think I got that right.’ It hasn’t always been as easy as it is right now to get game film. Back in the day, it was tough.
“I personally got into watching my film back, because it helps me learn what I did right and wrong and what I need to change.”
The two officiated their last basketball game together on Feb. 21 at Edwards County High School in Albion.
Nick Snidle was the third official with Ryan and Terry.
A younger official, Ryan said Snidle was “hungry to learn.”
“We tried to give him every chance we got,” Ryan said.
Ryan was the same way when he first started.
He gradually asked questions and improved over time. He started in junior high basketball before moving his way up.
“High school became a different dynamic. We always looked for someone who needed our help,” Ryan said. “That was me, to begin with. Dad would always bring another experienced official along and I would learn from them and then, later on, Dad and I were looking around for younger officials and would ask the question, ‘Who wants to learn?’”
The two officiated last year’s St. Anthony and Newton girls basketball game at St. Anthony High School.
That game ended with a pair of game-winning free throws by Bulldogs guard Adysen Rios.
“That game came down to the wire,” Ryan said. “The entire game was good, well-played and emotional. A lot was going on. After the games, we would always break them down — different things, different plays, what happened here, what happened there. We did a good job of recapping and continuing to learn and that was one thing that Dad and I always brought up.
“We were constantly learning.”
Those are the types of games that Ryan will surely cherish with his father more than any of the others.