That lovely time of year has arrived when we start to grumble about giving up on our new year’s resolutions. And make no mistake — I am no exception. Although I always look forward to the new year and the idea of “turning over a new leaf,” I’ll be the first to admit that for every grand declaration of big changes and next steps, there has been inevitable distraction and eventual demise. That’s not to say I don’t take steps to become a better person. And I don’t doubt the same is true for you, too! Which brings me to a much larger topic than simply your “New Year’s Resolution.” What about the goals we don’t set down? What about the larger principles that we allow to guide us each day?
Values can be defined as a person’s principles or standards of behavior, and they differ from goals because you can never fully “achieve” them. Think of them like cardinal directions, they provide necessary guidance but you never truly arrive at “east.” And, for what it’s worth, I am sure that you hold many values that may not always be at the forefront of your mind but still play a role in how you behave and interact with others daily. For example, you might identify that you value being generous with others, and while we may recognize we can accomplish generous acts, there is truly no “end” to living in line with this value. The same can be said about kindness or respect. Values help provide direction to our lives, and quite frankly, meaning. As Joseph Campbell wrote, “Life is without meaning. You bring the meaning to it. The meaning of life is whatever you ascribe it to be.” Have you considered the values you apply to your own life and sense of purpose?
This consideration becomes important when we acknowledge that much of our well-being depends on our personal choices. And there is evidence to support the idea that aligning those choices with a larger value can improve your mental health, simply by providing you with a sense of purpose, as Campbell encourages. And many of us do this all the time! But clearly defining our values can provide clarity for us on an individual level and make it easier for our values to connect us with others. And shared values within a community are how we truly make change in this world — the kind of change that extends beyond a resolution to eat better or take more steps.
As we move further into 2024, I encourage you to consider this. Take some time to be brave enough to ask yourself, “What values do I align with?” and “How do I demonstrate that to others?” As far as concrete action steps go, maybe you’ll give it some thought over this quarter. Maybe you’ll even write a few things down. Or share the idea with others. Perhaps it becomes a bigger topic of conversation over the next six months, and by the end of the year you can identify larger actions you have taken on your recently-defined-values’ behalf. But whatever you choose to do, just promise to not be too hard on yourself along the way.