For my entire adult life, I have been a freelance photographer for several newspapers and television stations throughout Michigan and beyond. Multiple times my editors have encouraged me to put a pen to the paper and start writing. Not one to engage in debates — friendly or otherwise — I chose to stick with photojournalism.
A life experience motivated me to reconsider writing for the purpose of sharing uncomplicated topics, and fulfill an ambition to put a cheerful feeling in the reader’s heart. We all could use a dose of positivity.
A trending behavior has me stepping out of my “happy topics only” policy. If I can save just one life, it’s worth being uncomfortable for.
Amanda Todd was a 15-year-old Canadian student who ended her life after being bullied online by her peers. In Texas, 11-year-old Jocelynn Carranza, who was bullied by her classmates, was found unresponsive by her mother and died a few days later. In Florida, a 10-year-old student committed suicide after being bullied by his teacher, and a 12-year-old girl was taunted in person and online, and ended her life. Thomas Mullaney, 15, hanged himself after being threatened and bullied on Facebook. Phoebe Prince was a 15-year-old Irish immigrant who hung herself after getting cyberbullied. A 14-year old girl in New Jersey committed suicide after a video of her being assaulted by bullies was uploaded to social media for all to see.
With more than 3 billion users worldwide, Facebook ranks as the No. 1 social media platform. What was created to connect society has become a highway to spread hate, bully one another, gossip vicious lies, destroy livelihoods, humiliate, and air our dirty laundry. How did Facebook and other social media platforms become so powerful?
From humans. Society. You. Me. Everyone who uses social media and scrolls by the bully posts without intervening, or smirks while reading the “harmless” comments, hiding behind the keyboard from fear of being bullied themselves.
Suicide, unfortunately, is something I am very familiar with. It has touched close to home. It has touched home. Long before the birth of social media, two of my brothers — for different reasons — ended their lives. Years later, three long-time friends whom I also loved, took their lives. Survivors are left behind and wondering why, beating themselves up for not seeing the signs. Or did we, and not know what to do?
Our guts and consciences tell us suicide is the result of mental illness, and we want to hold the government accountable for not doing enough to treat it. While that may be a valid reason for many, what about the suicides that are inflicted by the tormenting from society? When is the last time you logged in to social media and read posts, all of which were positive in nature? How many times have we scrolled, seen a hateful post, and put the brakes on to read every last comment and reaction, but did nothing to stop it? The signs are right here in front of us — but what are we doing about them?
Bullying is anything but harmless. Behind the words we speak, type, support, “like,” or laugh at, lies the simple and brutal truth — bullying kills. And far too often, those words are irreversible. It’s sad enough to see our youth engaging in that kind of behavior, but a whole different level when it is instigated by adults. We should be setting better examples for our kids and hold each other accountable. We don’t know what the other person is going through, or when our words will be the last that they hear. We don’t know their backstory, and basic human decency shouldn’t have to.
We have the power to spread hate on social media, but we also have the power to spread love. Be a light in the dark. Choose kindness. Choose not to engage in gossip. Choose not to judge. Above all, choose to stand up and be a voice of support for the person being torn down.
If you take nothing else from this, remember that our words have weight. Let’s use them to lift one another, not crush. Because one life lost to bullying is one too many.